Friday, July 19, 2019

Simple, But Not Easy

Another attempt to not drink, ever AGAIN.

What is different this time?

  • I have a virtual sober-buddy.
  • I have a nephew who I am mentoring about alcohol abuse.
  • I am seeking spiritual guidance, through study, on a weekly basis.

There are more avenues I can seek to help with abstaining from alcohol, but for now, I feel confident in what I am doing different to make this time STICK.

It is so simple, do not drink.

It is not easy, to not drink, for all the many reasons I've written about in the past.

But it is possible.  I know it will take more work on my part to achieve.

I'm READY.

Saturday, July 6, 2019

Things you think about...

It's Saturday night, I'm drinking a few beers.  Since Memorial weekend, I've been drinking here and there, with a couple times drinking way too much.  I can't say why I give in to drinking, when I know it's bad for me.  I know from all my readings, my brain is wired to want more, and more, when I do drink.  I start off drinking, enjoying the subtle change to my mind set, but then, at times, I go too far.  My story/experience is nothing new, it's the story of many.

Tonight is the last time I plan to drink.  If the stars align, it will be the last time ever.

I've been here before, in the last two years, where I'm giving it my best shot to give up drinking for good.  I haven't managed to quit since I started blogging two years ago, but I have managed to rein it in significantly.  One of the positive outcome from blogging, sharing my story, reaching out to others, and being honest with myself, of my problem, is the change in my mind-set.

I have made progress with the way I used to drink.  I haven't given up hope one day I will never drink, alcohol, again.  And while I've not reached my goal, while I've beaten myself up about it, while I've struggled to stay strong, I've not given up trying.

As Marcus Aurelius said- "The things you think about determine the quality of your mind.  The soul becomes dyed with color of its thoughts."

I keep thinking, I keep believing, I keep trying, I will never, ever drink again.