I made it through Saturday night! As many have shared, countless times, weekends are the hardest when first giving up the booze. It was hard. Not grueling hard, but difficult to say the least. I managed to cook a homemade meal, and bake brownies with no wine in my hand while doing so. My husband, who can drink moderately, felt bad for me, but knows it is necessary for me to stop drinking. Maybe with time, he won't drink at home, but for now this is my course to steer alone.
This morning I woke early (mornings are the best right now) to the sound of light rain. I live in Southern California, and we have been in drought mode for years. But this past six months, we had more rain than anyone can remember and it's done wonders for the terrain! I took this as a sign. One, it rarely rains in June here. Two, rain always washes away the grime and leaves everything fresh and shiny.
Maybe this is what is happening to me. I hope so.
We have had a lot of rain here in Minnesota, also.
ReplyDeleteI know your state needs the rain!
It is strange at first to break apart the activities that are tied to drinking...cooking and wine seem to be one mostly hard for women.
The hardest one for me was going out to dinner with hubs, and not drinking.
I had that tied so closely to drinking, and being romantic.
But I have finally broken it.
xo
Wendy
Yes, I know there will be many habits I need to change which always involved alcohol. I can't wait for the day I no longer associate drinking with so many things. For now, I don't think about the next event, as it's too hard. I want to be where you are at Wendy, one day.
ReplyDeleteYou can...don't think ahead.
DeleteJust today.
xo
Wendy
The one thing that really kept me going the first few months was the "smug cup of coffee" in the morning. I know I have also talked alot about that but it was super important to me.
ReplyDeleteIf ever i have a crappy night's sleep or take meds for a migrane I lose that feeling so it keeps me on the straight and narrow.
Also, now some time has passed, the changes I am going through - it's like I'm awake for the first time in years and that keeps me going.
It must be so hard to have a drinker at home, maybe you can as Anne at Ainsobriety as she has mentioned having her husband (before he stopped drinking) on different sober paths.
Good on you Lia
M xx
PS One thing I notice looking back at month one - huge ups and downs in one week.
ReplyDelete"I feel great!" "I feel like crap" "I'm happy" "I'm angry"
Haha - we have to laugh at ourselves or we will cry :)
xx