The Power of One

I've been drinking for 20+ years, heavy for most of that time, sad to say.  I have always journaled since my early twenties, and sprinkled through has been stories of my drinking too much here and there.  It wasn't until 2010, that the sprinkles became constant entries into my writing.  Of course it would be the case, my drinking had gotten to the point of stupidity on so many occasions, it just wasn't funny anymore.  In 2012, February 29th, Leap Year, I lost my job after 19 years with the company.  My drinking increased exponentially!  At that time, I went to a few AA meetings, but couldn't get into the spirit of those meetings.  I just didn't feel comfortable, probably because I really wasn't ready to give up alcohol.  I also told my close family and friends of my probably, and they were all supportive, but I still kept the secret from many others.  I still am ashamed about my drinking problem, but I am slowly changing this perspective.   April of 2015, I started a sub-journal, only about my alcohol intake.  I thought if I tracked how much I drank per day, I would shock myself into sobriety.  Didn't work.

Then in November of 2015 I found Mummy was a Secret Drinker blog site.  It was a life-line.  I reached out to her a few times via email and she was so dynamic, supportive and sincere.  Because of her, I bought the Vale book, tried some of her tips, etc. and gave it a go on January 1, 2016 to get sober.  It lasted 40 days until I took that one drink and by June of 2016, I was back to drinking almost every day.

It's taken a year to give this sober ride another shot!  A whole year.  In that time, I have read so many wonderful blogs, have emailed a few of you wonderful, strong women out there in the soberverse, signed up for Belle's 100 Day Challenge, downloaded Wine Bitches materials, etc.  But it wasn't until I recently came across Giving Up Drugs and Alcohol's blog, that I really decided to do this again. You can never know why, the "one thing" kicks in and helps to make a start, a new beginning, but it does.

So I started a blog six days ago.  Just quick entries.  Trying a new tool.  And Giving has commented on most of those baby entries!  Giving has been the "one" to make me cry in gratitude, to make me keep going the "one" more day!  Thank you for giving me "Giving".

Lastly, thank you ALL, everyone of you, for being the "one" to so many others!  What's great about this, is, One turns into Two, turns into Three, turns into....you get it!

I'm well, and I feel ALIVE!